I would rather have starred in Barbie, says Cillian Murphy

OPPENHEIMER star Cillian Murphy has admitted wishing he and Margot Robbie had swapped roles and she had played the boring nuclear scientist. 

Murphy, who is nominated for an Oscar, told press that he auditioned for Barbie but was passed over and had to do Oppenheimer for the money.

He continued: “Frankly, Robbie hasn’t got the chops for such a meaty role. But she looks good in a fedora which is all you need for a Christopher Nolan popcorn movie.

“As Barbie, I’d have f**king slayed. There would have been an edge of darkness to the comedy, a glimpse of the howling void beneath the dream house. And Gosling and I have got chemistry she can’t even dream of.

“But instead I’m running around doing the mandatory sex scenes and big explosions in a summer blockbuster that’s so formulaic you’ve forgotten the plot by the time the credits are rolling.

“That crucial Neighbours background means everyone respects her as an actor, while I’m most famous for playing a flat-capped psychopath in a forgettable BBC drama. I would have owned that role. Hollywood just doesn’t give men a chance.”

Robbie said: “I turned down Oppenheimer. I’m better than that.”

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'What a sad little life, Jane': six TV moments that deserve epic dramatisations

DOES the world really need a dramatisation of Emily Maitlis’s interview with Prince Andrew? When these key TV moments have yet to get big-budget remakes? 

‘What a sad little life, Jane’: Come Dine With Me, 2016

There are many great speeches on screen, from Russell Crowe’s address in Gladiator to Logan Roy’s ‘You’re pirates!’ diatribe in Succession. But none have made such a mark on Britain’s national psyche as Peter Marsh being an epically sore loser on Come Dine With Me. Cast Gary Oldman in the role and within the year he’s hoisting an Oscar.

Children interrupt BBC News interview, 2017

Great comedy is about timing, and here it was perfect. The swaggering toddler, the wheeling baby, the frantic wife, it just builds and builds. Make it the heart of a movie about one man’s struggle to explain South Korean politics. Audiences would watch repeatedly, breathlessly awaiting that wonderful moment when the door swings open.

Changing Rooms’ teapot disaster, 2000

Basically Titanic, but with Handy Andy and Linda Barker instead of Leo and Kate. The stakes are incredibly high when a collection of hideous novelty teapots worth an incredible £6,000 – if you don’t think that’s incredible, you haven’t seen the teapots – are placed on a suspended shelf made of MDF and fishing wire. Will they survive? F**k no.

Guy Goma is interviewed, BBC News 24, 2006

A perfectly-weighted farce in which a man expecting to be interviewed for a BBC job is instead interviewed live on air about a subject he has very little knowledge of and bluffs his way through magnificently while saying nothing of any substance at all. Exposes the entire 24-hour news industry as bullshit watched by nobody. Searing.

‘David’s dead’ on Celebrity Big Brother 2016

Angie Bowie was in the Big Brother house when her former husband passed away. But the drama that ensued as she told housemate Tiffany Pollard ‘David’s dead’ was Shakespearean. A full seven minutes of twists, turns and mistaken identities played out before housemates realised she meant David Bowie not David Gest, who was asleep in the bedroom. Gripping.

‘You’re joking, not another one!’ on BBC News, 2017

A day-in-the-life dramatisation of Brenda from Bristol as she goes about her business in post-Brexit Britain before being asked her opinion on Theresa May calling a snap election. Think Ken Loach if he was a bit more cuddly, with comedy Bristolian accents and Brenda played by Maggie Smith. Ideal for showing on the eve of our upcoming, long-awaited general election.