THE Duchess of Cambridge has borrowed a diamond necklace from the Queen to have it priced up at the pawnbrokers.
The necklace, a wedding gift that you never see the Queen in so she wouldn’t miss, was previously thought to be priceless but is actually worth a disappointing £1.8 million.
Kate said: “I should have known when the old bag told me it was made in India. Basically it’s Primark jewellery and a waste of my fucking time.
“I’ll see if I can get any decent offers for it on eBay. If I take the photo just right it will look a lot bigger than what it actually is.
Numerous other items have been reported missing from around Buckingham Palace, including 600 Da Vinci drawings the Duchess of Cambridge says she’s sent to get framed.
Palace staff also claim to have seen Kate typing Windsor Castle, Balmoral and Clarence House into Zoopla before totalling figures on a calculator.
She said: What did you expect of a commoner? We dont believe in love, or duty, or serving the nation. Were only out for what we can get for ourselves.
Theyre trapped now Ive had the kid.