Queen a right old cow, says Sun

THE Queen is such an old cow, the Sun confirmed. 

The newspaper, the subject of an official complaint from the monarch after yesterday’s story claiming she backed Brexit, has responded with 12 pages slagging off the UK’s most hated great-grandmother.

An editorial read: “She lives it up on your money but prefers fancy rugby to football and snooty corgis to honest British bulldogs.

“Sneering Elizabeth covers the walls of her four homes in stuck-up art and never misses a night at the opera, which ordinary Gogglebox-loving Britons would hate.

“We’ve listened in to her private phone calls and she never says anything nice about you and wouldn’t lend you a swan even if you really needed one.”

Royalist Roy Hobbs said: “If it’s a choice between the monarch of our country or a newspaper serving up war, tits and invented transfer deals, I know where my patriotism lies.

“Who the fuck does she think she is? It’s Brexit or the guillotine.”