UK in constitutional crisis as man says Meghan prettier than Kate

BRITAIN is facing an unprecedented constitutional crisis after a Warwickshire man admitted finding Meghan more attractive than the future Queen.

The entire future of the monarchy is at risk after Nathan Muir said, in earshot of an entire pub, that Kate did not look like much of a goer but her sister-in-law was ‘well fit’.

All official business has been suspended while government and Palace officials meet to attempt to chart a way through the greatest crisis the country has faced since the abdication of Edward VIII.

An insider said: “How? After two years reviling those rotten Sussexes, two years of non-stop front pages about Kate’s dazzling, ageless beauty? How could he have got it so wrong?

“The man in question has been arrested and is under torture right now, but all that’s so far elicited is that he saw her ‘at that Invicious Games and thought ‘I would smash that’.

“If word of this spreads, the monarchy will topple. Meghan is a bitter, exiled old witch. Kate is the fairest of them all and will rightly become Queen. It’s the very basis of British law. Anything else is unthinkable.”

Attempting to clarify, Muir said: “No, but it’s just, like, if you didn’t know you’d definitely go Meghan, right? I mean Harry did, and he’s a war hero.”

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Only Connect, QI and four other TV shows for people who think they're better than you

JUST settling down for Celebrity Ex on the Beach when the smart-arse smuggo you live with flicks one of these wanky shows on?

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