What will the royal baby look like?

USING a combination of art and science, the Institute for Studies has created these incredible images of what Kate and William’s beloved offspring might look like.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “Since she sadly passed on, the Queen Mum’s spirit has been floating around like something in a Japanese horror film, waiting for a chance to be reborn. So the nation’s deceased grandmother could possess Kate’s baby, resulting in this.”

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “It’s dark in Kate’s womb, so the child could develop extra large ‘bush baby’ eyes to navigate the inky blackness and find the fruit in her tummy.”

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “The baby will be born in 2013. This is practically the distant future, so probably it will come out as a robot. It will have a futuristic name, like Zarkon-4 or Zarkon-4B if it’s a girl.”




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Dog taxi drivers 'by 2018'

DOGS will be driving taxis within the next five years, it has been claimed.

After the opening of a dog driving school in New Zealand, experts predict that canine cab drivers will soon become the norm.

Animal trainer Stephen Malley said: “Dogs are surprisingly good drivers and their innate aggression is perfect for navigating the streets of London.

“The only obstacles are that dogs are programmed to kill any stranger who gets in a vehicle with them, and will swerve to run over cats.”