PLANET Earth has confirmed that it really does not like Sting.
The singer attended a massive climate change march over the weekend, causing Earth to speculate on why cool celebrities never go to these things.
Earth said: There is something about that so-called Sting that really makes me want to drop a natural disaster on his ass.
Its just his face.
The planet is increasingly frustrated that no good actors or musicians ever speak up for it.
Mark Ruffalo seems like a right bedwetter. And Emma Thompson no.
Why does Lemmy from Motorhead never turn out for ‘green’ happenings? Or Chow Yun-Fat?
Hard Boiled is my favourite film. Despite your hippy preconceptions I am really into the cinema of extreme violence.
Earth added: I believe if we work together we can stop global warming.
All you have to do is not have any sexual intercourse ever again.