Impudent rebel slug refusing to vacate kitchen

A REBELLIOUS slug has been found gliding confidently across a kitchen floor long after it should have gone back to wherever slugs live.

The lone gastropod contravened the centuries-old slug-human pact, which states that all slugs must completely disappear from sight by daybreak or pay the ultimate price of having salt put on them.

Homeowner Emma Bradford said: “I went down to make a cup of tea and it was just nonchalantly sliding past the cat’s bowl with the confident self-assurance of a slug version of Beyonce.

“He or she really needs to go back to where he or she came from. I don’t mean leaving Britain or anything, just into the garden would be fine.

Bradford added: “I have no idea what those slugs get up to in the kitchen at night but it looked to me like a classic walk of shame.”

Slug Roy Hobbs said: “It was a wild night. Let’s just say that shimmery trail may not have been slime.”