Britain faces exploding chin epidemic

YOU will not be able to walk down the street without some woman’s botoxed chin exploding all over you.

Experts have warned that the increase in cosmetic surgery will lead to an epidemic of faces that look like they are either melting or being dismantled by a gang of cockney builders.

Julian Cook, Professor of What Were You Thinking at Roehampton University, said: “Because of programmes like The Only Way is Essex this country is full of complete and utter, grade-A fucknuts.

“If I was you I would pretend to be a cosmetic surgeon and when one of these cretins walks in off the street, fill their forehead with Angel Delight and charge them fifty quid.”