A DAD would rather die of dehydration than buy bottled water, he has confirmed.
Joe Turner, aged 57, has maintained a firm stance on not paying what comes from the tap for free throughout his life and insists he will continue to do so whatever the British summer throws at him.
Son Simon said: “We’ve always found dad’s ‘tap water only’ stance quite amusing.
“When a waiter asks him if he would like a mineral water and he looks at them like they’ve just shit in his hand, it’s great.
“But it’s less funny during a heatwave, when he’s refusing to stop at the corner shop on a dog walk despite looking like he’s going to keel over. Dad. It’s a quid. Choose your health over your principles.”
Joe Turner said: “Paying? For water? What’s next, paying for air? Stop your bloody fussing, I’m fine.
“You know what ‘Evian’ spells backwards? Exactly. I got a good laugh out of that from the nurse changing my IV when I was admitted to hospital for heat exhaustion.”