Thursday, 4th March 2021

Kid perfectly fit and well all day has 6,000 ailments at bedtime

A GIRL who felt perfectly well all day long has suddenly developed 6,000 mystery illnesses at bedtime.

Six-year-old Alice Bradford’s symptoms include a hurty toe, a scratch on her knee from a fall she had two years ago, something that is clearly not toothache and an invisible spot.

Mother Emma Bradford said: “She’s been running around the park all day and seemed fine, but as soon as her head hit the pillow the mysterious ailments started.

“Since I put her to bed three hours ago she’s told me she has a tummy ache, a cough and ‘hot feet’, whatever that is. Oh and diabetes and the plague. She must have got those off the telly.

“I’d take her to A&E but we'd need every specialist in the country to treat all these illnesses. Also she tends to make a miraculous recovery by the morning while I am bl**dy shattered.”

Bradford is now considering launching a Just Giving page to fund research into the little-understood condition, which can only be treated by staying up with an iPad or watching TV.