A GIG largely attended by the over-50s was only slightly marred by the entire audience spending most of it servicing their bladders.
The concert by 90s band James was largely seated, which seemed like a blessing until row after row was forced to repeatedly rise for someone in urgent need of the loo.
Attendee Tom Booker said: “It’s always the same. We come out, we’re excited, we arrive at 7pm because that’s what it says on the tickets and we obey instructions without question.
“Except nothing’s happening for ages, the support act are bollocks and so, overwhelmed with the sheer thrill of not being at home silently scrolling our phones at opposite ends of the same sofa, we have a few pints.
“Then the gig starts, we’re all cheering wildly and swaying slightly, and before the first song’s over somebody saying ‘excuse me’ politely while trying to hide their frantic need to urinate.
“And that’s the script for the whole bloody night. Up and down, up and down, and if it’s not your row it’s the one in front. Why they can’t hold it I don’t know. I only went four times in 90 minutes.”
James frontman Tim Booth said: “This is why we litter the set with our unpopular new material. But it still isn’t enough for the decrepit pissing gargoyles we call fans.”
