THE people who were utterly convinced that fat was the worst thing are now utterly convinced that it is sugar.
Food scientists revealed that this time they were almost certainly 100 percent correct and the thing you must absolutely avoid is definitely probably sugar.
Dr Martin Bishop said: “Did I say it was fat? I don’t think I did say it was fat.
“Okay, maybe I did. It was a long time ago and there was a lot of stuff going on in my private life that I don’t want to talk about. Anyway. It’s definitely sugar.
Nathan Muir, from Stevenage, said: “You did seem awfully sure it was fat. That’s why I gave up butter. That’s why I’ve been eating this omega 3 bullshit.
“Because you seemed so very, very sure.”
He added: “I absolutely dare you to change your mind again.”
Jane Thompson, from Peterborough, said: “I’m just going to assume the entire debate is controlled by multinational corporations and eat whatever the fuck I want.
“Which is probably what they want me to do anyway.”