20% Of Americans Think Obama Is A Talking Car

ONE in five Americans believe that President Barack Obama is a car that can talk, according to a new survey.

Yes we can, Michael

It is the latest blow to the beleaguered commander-in-chief who has struggled to connect with mainstream America and convince them that he is a person not a vehicle.

The survey found that more than half believe the president was manufactured in either Japan or South Korea and arrived in Atlantic City on board a large freight vessel in 1993.

Forty-eight percent think he is a mid-price sports coupé with high levels of equipment but poor reliability. And among those who believe he is a talking car, more than 70% claim he uses a refined mid-Atlantic accent, while 23% insist it is a fuzzy, robotic monotone.

Martin Bishop, deputy chairman of the Republican National Committee, said: “I would just like him to have the courage to produce his birth certificate so that we can see once and for all what kind of car he is.”

Stephen Malley, a sales executive from Atlanta, said: “I read that he just sits around all day drinking Castrol GTX and smoking reefer. Our president is a poorly maintained foreign death trap that talks hippy dippy shit about moonbeams.”

And Tom Logan, an electrician from Pittsburgh, added: “He sleeps in a garage and his full name is Barack Mitsubishi Obama.”

A White House spokesman said last night: “The president has been in cars. Many of his relatives and even some of his friends can drive cars. The president actually quite likes cars.

“But he’s not a car.”

Helen Archer, an estate agent from Bloomington, Indiana, said: “I wouldn’t necessarily choose a car as president, but if he is a car then I’d certainly prefer him to be one that can talk.

“The last thing this country needs right now is one of those silent, menacing cars like Christine or Herbie.”