NIGEL Farage will wear a white dress and heels to serenade Donald Trump at his presidential inauguration, it has been confirmed.
With many high-profile performers rejecting offers to perform, the former UKIP leader has promised a ‘sultry’ and ‘husky’ rendition of Happy Birthday.
Farage said: “I’m going to strike just the right balance between mainstream family entertainment and outright eroticism.
“As well as being sensual, I am delicate and vulnerable, like a bird in a gilded cage, and I want to bring that across.
“Paul Nuttall might to a bit on his banjo too, if there’s time.”
Farage believes that a successful performance could lead to some sort of courtesan role that involves feeding Trump grapes while wearing a leather uniform.