BLOW jobs are an official unit of currency in Magaluf, it has emerged.
Local resident Tom Booker said: “Anyone here will tell you that a glass of wine costs a blow job, just as a loaf of bread is four hand jobs. My house, for example, is valued at 10 swinging parties and an S & M session.
“I don’t see what all the fuss is about.”
Magaluf’s sex currency was introduced back in the 13th century when the island was part of the Emirate of Cordoba and the system prevails despite residents frequently complaining of sore wrists and locked jaws.
Daily Mail journalist Mary Fisher said: “This shocking lack of foreigner morals makes young female holiday makers vulnerable to exploitation.
“They should stay home and engage in good wholesome pursuits, like reading poorly-written tabloid articles where actresses describe their body anxieties while posing for stilted quasi-lesbian beach shots.”