A CAT is trying to live an upmarket, Sheba lifestyle on Whiskas money, it has emerged.
Holly, a four-year-old tabby, insists on receiving the highest quality food, service and lodgings despite not contributing a penny towards the running of the household.
Owner Emma Bradford said: “I try my best to meet Holly’s exceptionally high standards, and they are insanely high, especially for someone who shits in a box in my living room.
“Supermarket own-brand, Felix, Whiskas, she just won’t eat it. I swear she can even tell when I’ve bought tins that are on offer.
“The only food she’ll deign to consume is stuff that has a picture of a snooty pedigree cat on it. It’s like the food tastes better to her when she knows I’m spending half the week’s wages on it.”
Holly said: “If Emma wants me to make her home feel less lonely and bleak, she has to treat me accordingly. Anyway, I’ll be in cat heaven within a decade, so what do I care if she ends up poor?”
Emma Bradford responded by telling Holly that if she wasn’t careful she would be in cat heaven sooner than she had imagined.