Gorgeous, pert 25-year-old with perfect skin vows to embrace ageing naturally

A BEAUTIFUL 25-year-old without a hint of wrinkle or sag has decided that she will age gracefully, with no cosmetic intervention.

Hannah Tomlinson, who has a youthful glow, perfect figure and no bags under her eyes, says she is perplexed by the trend among older women to get Botox, fillers and surgery to avoid the ravages of time.

She said: “Personally, I find women like Helen Mirren and Judi Dench absolutely beautiful, even though a lot of people think they’re decrepit has-beens who shouldn’t be out in public.

“So when I see someone who’s getting on in years – maybe a 35-year-old – wanting to get rid of her frown lines or crow’s feet I feel so sad. Why can’t they just embrace the beauty of getting all wrinkly and haggard?

“When I get old, I won’t touch a drop of retinol serum or have any injections. I’m going to let the years of wisdom show on my face. I’ll be married with kids by then so I won’t care about looking attractive anyway.”

Hannah’s mother Kelly Bradford said: “When I was young and fit I naively thought exactly the same. But I starting greying at 26, so if genetics have a say Hannah will soon change her tune.”

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British women best at being pissed

BRITISH women have triumphed against their gutless continental counterparts in the global race to be the best binge-drinkers.

Women from these isles regularly down six drinks or more in a single session, and are matched only by permanently hammered Danish women in the battle to be most pissed in Europe.

Sue Traherne, who cleared two bottles of Pinot Grigio last night even though it was a Tuesday, said: “I knew I must be doing it for a reason.

“France? Bunch of so-called sophisticate wine-sippers. Germans? Two pints and their frauleins get frisky. Italians? Too busy talking. And forget the lightweights outside Europe.

“No, through years of dedicated drinking and mastery of the techniques surrounding it – urinating in taxi ranks, building boozing stamina with a kebab, fighting in the toilets – we’ve won through to become world champions.

“On holiday when I see the spiritless Spaniard, the abstemious American, the temperate Thai I sneer at all of them. They can’t get as pissed as I can. They’re not as pissed as I am right now.”

Romanian woman Paula Bruma said: “I am so jealous. I would give anything for such an epic blotting out of reality.”