A LOAD of complete wankers are blowing a sunny bank holiday after lockdown on steaming off wallpaper or some shit.
Around the country, the worst bellends are queueing up in B&Q, repointing brickwork, painting skirting boards and putting shelves up when they could be getting wrecked in the garden.
Contemptible twat Nathan Muir said: “I’ve been really looking forward to pulling all these dado rails off. I can’t wait to get stuck in.
“I already retiled the bathroom over Easter. The neighbours had family round drinking and singing in the garden until 2am. I know because I was still up grouting.
“My mate Nigel’s replacing his whole kitchen because it’s been in three-and-a-half years, his wife’s moaning and it’s well overdue a refresh. Now there’s a guy who knows how to spend a bank holiday. I envy him.”
Donna Sheridan said: “To be fair, last August bank holiday I did paint a set of bookshelves mauve. I don’t remember doing it. They weren’t my bookshelves. I don’t even know where I got the paint from.
“I was obviously blackout drunk, but that’s the point of a bank holiday.”