What kind of winter hat wanker are you?

ARE you a fun-loving bobble-hat person or do you prefer to look like someone who murders deer in the woods? Find out what your winter hat says about you.


Bobble-hat wearers believe that they are cute and fun because they have a stupid pom-pom on their heads. And the bigger the bobble the more ‘fun’ they are. Well, they think they’re fun. Everyone else thinks they’re childish twats.

Double bobble-hat 

Similar to the bobble hat wearer but twice as bad, a person with two bobbles on their head is so desperate to be quirky that you can spot them from several metres away. Luckily this makes them easy to avoid.

Trapper hat 

Wow, did this guy skin a rabbit to make his own hat after becoming lost on a freezing moor during a deer hunting weekend in Scotland? No, it’s just Dave from IT after a trip to Top Man. He will try to convince you he made it himself though, and then creepily ask you out on a date.

Beanie hat 

The beanie hat wearer wants to appear kind of edgy, like they smoke a bit of weed at the weekend. Sadly, this look has been hijacked by men who are thinning on top and believe that, even when worn indoors, it accurately simulates a full head of hair.

Flat cap 

Flat cap wearers like to think they are giving off a cool Peaky Blinders vibe when in reality they look more like Del Boy. Winter gives them the perfect opportunity to show how trendy they are, by dressing up like a Brummie gangster from the inter-war years. More fool them because their ears are in no way covered.


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Prince Andrew fears new series of The Crown will destroy his reputation

Prince Andrew is reportedly concerned that the new series of The Crown will besmirch his squeaky-clean reputation.

Those close to the Duke of York say he is worried that embarrassing aspects of his intensely private personal life will be thrust into the spotlight by the Netflix hit.

A source said: “All Andy really likes to do in his down time is relax with a pizza and some dough balls and stay out of trouble.

“However, he’s anxious that the series might have turned up some past dirt on him, like the fact that he once dated Koo Stark who was in a soft-core porn film. That’s pretty serious stuff.

“Or they might make a thing about him being a general gadabout and wastrel who spends lots of money. He just doesn’t want people to think badly of him.

“Having always been so well loved and respected by the British public, this level of scrutiny will be stressful for him. He might even spontaneously start sweating again.

“It’s a shame, because usually when he gets involved with something American everything turns out so well for him.”