Britain’s favourite sexual position is watching television

BRITAIN’S favourite sexual position is watching the television, according to a new survey.

Tom Logan and his girlfriend Emma Thomas, who have been together for eight years, are among the 95 percent of long-term couples that prefer to have sex this way.

Logan said: “We thought our sex life was dead but then Emma she suggested we try something new that she’d ‘seen in a magazine’, which got me quite excited. It was the Radio Times.

“She told me to stay fully dressed and sit on the sofa with my eyes open. She then gripped tightly onto the remote, one thing led to another and before you know it we were watching a repeat of QI on Dave.”

Professor Henry Brubaker, of the Insititute for Studies, said: “Unlike, for example, the Reverse Dutch Steamboat, the the position is fairly straightforward. Also both parties are almost guaranteed to experience a climax, albeit within the narrative structure of what they’re watching.”

He added: “It is actually very difficult to conceive a child this way. I know I shouldn’t really have to point that out, but this is Britain in 2018.”