BRITONS have decided that ‘bubble’ is too cosy a term for a grim huddle of bored people stuck indoors with only each other for company.
Whilst a household bubble sounds like it should involve bouncy pink balloons and a giggling baby, the reality has been confirmed as depressingly different.
Bubble member Tom Logan said: “Before the pandemic, the word ‘bubble’ conjured up nice things like bottles of champagne and long, relaxing baths.
“Now, it means a household populated by a gang of increasingly resentful people in grubby bathrobes who can no longer be bothered to wash their hair.
“It needs to be renamed. Something like ‘consolidated unit of gloom’ or ‘pressurised time bomb of dislike’. Or perhaps ‘cluster of tedium’, which is snappy while still being honest.
“I suppose the only thing that makes it bubble-like is that eventually it will have to burst and I will never, ever see it again. I know they’re my parents and sister, but I just want them to f**k off forever.”