A COUPLE with a shared Facebook profile will be divorced with three months, it has been confirmed.
Tom and Helen Booker’s joint social media presence is only one indicator of the absolute shitfight into which their relationship has deteriorated.
The husband and wife also have dedicated weekly ‘date nights’ and a contrived portmanteau name that nobody has called them.
Tom Booker said: “We wanted the world to see how in love Tomelen is, and the fact she caught me sending messages to her cousin is completely irrelevant. We are a passionate couple, and all the shouting last weekend just proves it.”
Booker’s wife Helen said: “If people want to criticise us just because we wear matching jumpers with hearts on that’s their problem. It’s got nothing to do with the month I went to Italy by myself.
“I don’t care if my friends think it’s weird. I love him and he loves me and that’s the fucking end of it, alright?”