Man wishes he could admit threesome was a bit shit

A MAN lauded for having taken part in a threesome wishes he could confess how disappointing the whole experience was. 

Tom Booker, 28, is the hero of his peer group for the threesome he enjoyed with his ex-girlfriend and her housemate a week ago but is secretly longing to tell everyone it was not worth the bother.

He said: “They cheered when I arrived at the pub last night. I feel like such a fraud.

“Yes, there were moments when I was not only enjoying myself but revelling in the glory of it. But, being truthful, they were few and far between.

“There’s an awful lot of waiting about. And when you’re not waiting about, you’re extremely self-conscious about being watched by the person who is. Throws you off your game.

“And even when you’re fully occupied, if you know what I mean, it’s honestly work. You’re trying to concentrate on down here but you’ve also got a job to do up there and I just ended up feeling quite annoyed.

“Still, at least I got it done before I was 30. I bet Machu Picchu’s a load of shit as well.”