A GIRL holidaying with her boyfriend’s family for the first time is being treated like the daughter his mother never wanted to have.
Helen Archer is in Cornwall with boyfriend Steve Malley, his brother Ant, their father Brian and their mother Hazel who detests the spoiled trollop more with every passing moment.
Hazel said: “I was always happy with just a boy. Girls are too much fuss. Especially this vain little cow.
“The more desperate Helen is for me to like her, the more I want to throw her apparently endless collection of sun dresses in the sea.
“Imagine how traumatic it’d be if it was my own daughter I was snapping ‘Turn Instagram off, you’re not a model and never will be with those hips’ at. Scarred for life.
“I want to go back to being on holiday with three slightly absent men. And no way are her and my Steve sharing a room.
“No one is having sex in this holiday cottage – not my sons, not my husband, and certainly not this whore parading her happiness and youth in front of everyone.”
Son Ant agreed: “Helen’s like the sister I never knew. I don’t know what to say to her so I leave the room.”