Saturday, 4th April 2020

Woman breaking up with boyfriend can't decide which restaurant to ruin

A WOMAN taking her boyfriend for a break-up dinner cannot decide which restaurant she will never visit again. 

Donna Sheridan, aged 27, is torn between Nando’s or Watford’s second-best pizza restaurant to have a few drinks, a painful conversation, eventual weeping and to then shun forever.

She said: “I don’t like Nando’s, so that’s tempting. And it’s cheap, and how much do I want to invest in watching a grown man beg for a second chance? Also, free refills might soften the blow of breaking his heart.

“But it’s such a massive chain I’ll end up in there at some point, remembering his pathetic little screwed-up face with that beard he won’t shave even though I hate it, and that’ll be painful.

“So it’s probably Caravaggio’s, which I’ll never enter again after he makes a scene demanding to see my phone and gets thrown out for reaching for a pepper grinder.”

She added: “I broke up with my last boyfriend Tyler in a Jamie’s Italian. That worked out really well.”