Friday, 14th May 2021

Woman can't be arsed with eating outside if it's only with her boyfriend

A WOMAN cannot be bothered to sit in the cold outside a restaurant now that restrictions have lifted if the only person eating with her is her boyfriend.

Lucy Parry’s boyfriend Jack Browne asked if she would like to go out for a romantic meal only to be informed that he is not worth freezing her tits off for.

Parry said: “If it was one of the mates that I haven’t been able to get pissed with for months asking me out to dinner, I’d be there like a shot.

“But unfortunately it’s only Jack, whose stupid face and conversation I have endured all day, every day for 12 long months.

“He might think having dinner together out of the house will give our relationship a boost, but actually I’ll just resent the fact that he’s making me eat a cold pizza in the street when I could be tucked up at home ignoring him.

“Are we happy together? Yes. It’s just that our relationship works better when we don’t see each other much.”