Wednesday, 12th August 2020

38-year-old man has just learned it's 'could have' not 'could of'

A 38-YEAR-OLD man has only just learned that the correct phrasing is ‘could have’ rather than ‘could of’. 

Tom Logan admitted his world has been rocked by the revelation, not least because it came from the smart-arse 17-year-old work experience kid in his office.

He said: “Did everyone know this? Since when?

“I’ve got that on my CV. Oh God, I think it might have been in my marriage vows. I wondered why Word kept underlining it.

“It’s always been could of, ever since I learned to talk. I say it all the time. I could of said it five times today already. Could have. Fucking hell.”

Wife Janine Logan said: “He can’t stop going over conversations in his head. He said it might sound like hyperbowl, but he doesn’t know who he can trust anymore.

“I don’t know how to tell him you pronouce it ‘hyper-bow-lee’.”