MIMING the hand movements of DJing has finally overtaken air guitar solos.
New data shows there are 19 per cent more ageing men cupping one hand to their ear and scratching with the other than resting their finger-picking hand on their gut while extending the other vaguely outwards.
Pub landlord Norman Steele said: “There are areas of crossover – the air DJs will switch to guitar for Fool’s Gold – but in the main it’s all about doing spinbacks and pushing the faders.
“I put Pump Up The Volume by M/A/R/R/S on last week, and the pool table area came alive with balding men dropping some pretend scratch science.
“One guy was even flipping through an imaginary record box with a stern facial expression before doing an imaginary bump of coke.”
Teenager Emma Bradford said: “My uncle Matt’s so fried that one of his hands is permanently holding an imaginary record aloft as if to suggest it is a ‘tune’. We lead him around the front room like a cat, his knuckles scraping on the ceiling.
“It shows how pathetic behaviour can cross cultural divides. I look forward to 2045, when I horrify my kids by hitting the dancefloor and doing air selfies.”