Boyfriend has six pairs of Nike Air Max and two pairs of underpants

A MAN who has six pairs of Nike Air Max trainers has only two pairs of underpants, his girlfriend has confirmed. 

Tom Logan, aged 29, recently added a £130 pair of Air Max 95s to his collection after spotting them on eBay, and recently lost a pair of underpants after an accident on a night out.

Girlfriend Helen Archer said: “He recognises that it’s a problem, and says he’s buying a three-pack when he gets paid.

“How can a man survive on two pairs of underpants? It’s not like he’s doing a daily wash. And one of them’s like a spiderweb at the crotch.

“Meanwhile he’s Instagramming his trainers every morning and getting loads of likes. Are they all like him? Is every man with plum suede trainers going commando? It’s horrifying.”

Logan said: “What’s even the point of underpants? Nobody sees them.”

Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday

Is splitting the bill evenly a good idea, or do you have no concept of money?

YOU’VE enjoyed a marvellous meal with friends and now the bill has arrived. Should you just divide the whole thing equally, or do you actually understand how money works?

Take our quiz:

Who are you dining with? 

A) My good friends, who’ve been looking forward to this get-together all week as have I.
B) Some acquaintances who call themselves friends who I don’t like that much and certainly have no qualms about casually allowing to suffer for my pleasure.

How pricey is the restaurant? 

A) Nice but not what you’d call expensive, with an affordable wine list.
B) I don’t care. It’s not my problem.

What are you ordering?

A) No starter, a mid-range main course and perhaps a pudding if I’m feeling indulgent.
B) A starter I won’t eat, Waygu steak, a side dish, three bottles of wine, the cheese board, a couple of single malts between courses.

What is money? 

A) A token of payment used for goods and services, and there’s never bloody enough of it, is there! Haha. Please God don’t suggest we split the bill.
B) You know, I’m not really sure. I’ve never had to worry about it.


Mostly As: Of course you shouldn’t split the bill, even if it is a pain in the arse totting up. And put in for the tip.

Mostly Bs: Dividing the total between the number of diners is simpler and fairer. It’s all just numbers, isn’t it?