DOG enthusiasts have called for stranger and more physically dysfunctional breeds.
The rocketing popularity of noseless barrel-chested dogs has fuelled demand for even more distinctively nightmarish pets.
French bulldog owner Emma Bradford said: As much as I love having a pet that looks like an insects head welded onto the body of a monkey, I would prefer something even more fucked up.
Perhaps a breeder could create a dog with nine eyes on its arse and claws instead of paws. They could call it a crabrador.
I think it would have a lot of charm and character.
Stephen Malley owns one of those pedigree dogs with baggy flesh that hangs off its body in loose, scrotum-like folds.
He said: The shar-pei is an odd enough beast but I really want something that will make people in the park physically sick with terror.
Perhaps a snake-dog a pulsing tube of scaly muscle with a cute spaniel head. Please make me one of those.
I will let it sleep on my bed, and kiss it on the mouth.