A GROUP of middle class people sitting in a fancy house all genuinely think they are actually working class, it has emerged.
Tom Booker, his partner Carolyn Ryan and their annoying friends began the discussion over a dinner of cauliflower steaks from the Ottolenghi cookbook, when Tom opened a bottle of Newcastle Brown Ale.
Guest Martin Bishop said: “Tom took a big swig and belched, then looked at the bottle and said ‘Ah, the taste of home’. I pointed out that he was born in Cambridge but he said his parents met at university in Durham, so he was technically a ‘reet Geordie’.
“Then Carolyn started talking about how her first job had been as waitress in a greasy spoon, and Nikki chimed in saying that wasn’t exactly like working ‘down t’ pit’, like her great-grandma’s uncle had to do.
“Helen told us that her parents live on a farm, but we all know it’s actually a glamping site with flashy wooden hot tubs.
“At the end of the night I made a big fuss about leaving early to return to my council flat in Hackney. I’ve had it extensively remodelled and it’s worth several hundred grand, but I’m still a proper Cockney like Jamie Oliver.”