Easter eggs about a tenth the size you remember, confirm experts

MODERN Easter eggs are barely two disappointing mouthfuls, adults have confirmed.

After shamelessly raiding their children’s Easter egg stash, parents across Britain have reported a meagre haul of sickly chocolate.

Stephen Malley said: “When I was a kid you’d gorge on Easter eggs until you never wanted to eat chocolate again, but I might as well have not bothered breaking that egg open. I could’ve swallowed it whole.”

He added: “I’m starting to think the few seconds of satisfaction don’t justify having to pretend to my children that there was a break-in overnight.”

Chocolate economist Julian Cook said: “At their current rate of shrinkage, Easter eggs will be merely theoretical by 2025.

“You will simply be told that you’ve eaten one, probably via a text and then you’ll feel slightly nauseous and ashamed.”