Monday, 8th March 2021

Let’s write off this generation of kids and focus on the next lot, says Williamson

THE education secretary has confirmed that we are failing a generation of children, so we may as well forget them and put our efforts into the next set. 

Gavin Williamson agreed that children missing nearly a year of education and examinations have had their futures taken away from them, but that there is no point throwing good money after bad.

He continued: “Fair play, holding my hands up, we’ve made mistakes. Can’t go back and change that now, so let’s write these off and start again.

“The nation will always need minimum-wage earners without qualifications. And now we’ve got a solid foundation of those in the pipeline, the next generation can be artists or ballet dancers or whatever.

“If you’ve got a child aged between nine and 18, then you have my full apologies. But you’ll save on tuition fees so it’s not all bad, and it’ll be nice to have someone who can unblock a sink in the family.”

Mum Emma Bradford said: “I had high hopes for my children before the pandemic but Gavin’s right, it’s too late to fix the damage of a year of eight-hour PlayStation days now.

“And because they’re written off I can claim 12 years of childcare back against tax, so financially it’s a real windfall.”