Sunday, 9th May 2021

Man somehow remembers school fondly despite hating every second of it

A MAN has given a glowing account of his school days that is very different to how his friends remember it.

Office worker Tom Logan told friends in the pub how much he had enjoyed school, apparently misremembering his academic and sporting ineptitude and massive unpopularity.

Logan said: “I had a great time. I’d love to go back. I even wonder what some of the old teachers are up to nowadays. Remember Mr Griffiths? What a character.”

However childhood friend Nathan Muir said: “Tom seems to have somehow forgotten he was shit at everything and not very popular. What was his nickname again? Oh yeah. ‘Twat’.

“I can’t remember him having any friends except that weird kid Colin. He definitely wasn’t 'pretty good' at football as he claims because he spent every match standing alone in goal. 

“Also Mr Griffiths who he so fondly remembers hated all children with a vengeance. I think he’s in prison now. There was an incident with a sheep.

“At least nowadays kids have technology to remind them how shit school was. Gavin Mack the bully would definitely have filmed himself rubbing a dead frog on Tom’s head.”

Logan added: “It’s no wonder they say it's the best days of your life.”