AN unemployed, single and homeless man is racing against time to sort his life out before seeing his relatives for Christmas.“Maybe I say I’ve got an internet start-up?”
Tom Logan of Reading is struggling to find a positive spin on 11 months of decline for the annual meeting with his much more successful family.
He said: Ive got almost a month before Im passing Uncle John the sprouts, so theres still time to apply for a few college courses.
Sleeping on a mates couch for the second year running is fine if youre only doing it to save money to become a human rights lawyer.
Or did I say that last year?
At previous Christmases Logan has claimed to be doing a prestigious internship with a City firm and to be writing a novel, and successfully distracted attention from being dumped by his girlfriend with an anecdote about meeting Michael Caine.
He continued: The chances of meeting, dating and bringing Emma Stone back for Christmas to sit between Auntie Gladys and Uncle Pete are looking more remote by the day.
To be honest Im sort of praying that someone else in the family has had a worse year, like maybe my brothers business going under.
Thatd be a real Christmas miracle.