Man wearing f*cking shorts

THERE have been sightings of a man walking around in f*cking shorts.

Stunned bystanders saw the shorts-wearing man wandering around Bristol city centre, like he did not have a care in the world.

Shopper Tom Booker said: “I swear to God, he was wearing fucking shorts. I turned to my wife and said, ‘that man’s wearing fucking shorts’.

“She was like, ‘bloody hell, he is too’.

“It was really, really cold. He’s either some kind of superhero or just doesn’t own any trousers.”

Professor Henry Brubaker of the Institute for Studies said: “The only rational explanation is that the unidentified man must have been wearing some sort of two-tone trousers that were flesh-coloured from the knee downwards.

“There’s no way anyone’s going around wearing shorts, not in this weather.”

However shop owner Julian Cook said: “It was definitely shorts. I swear to God.

“Unbelievable. Fucking shorts.”