Men plucking up courage to spend summer in Y-fronts

MEN are hoping to walk the streets this summer wearing nothing but their underpants.

As temperatures soar to 19 degrees in parts of the UK, men are arguing that shorts are inadequate to cope with the stifling heat and that their pants will preserve all necessary decency.

Norman  Steele, wearing a pair of red Y-fronts with dramatic black piping, said: “Every new generation casts off the clothing which oppressed us in summers past.

“I have a photo of my grandfather on the seafront at Skegness in 1946, wearing a woollen three-piece suit with cloth cap, and he was still cautioned by police for rolling his trousers up an inch past the calves.

“In 1976, my father could enjoy shorts but still had to wear thick grey socks under his sandals and a string vest.

“In the modern day I have cast all upper body clothing aside, but still I am constricted by two layers around my python’s nest. And it gets sweaty down there.”

Steele hopes that all it will take is a critical mass of men in nothing but Y-fronts to break down the barriers and make trouserlessness acceptable.

He added: “Don’t worry, ladies; there’s no danger of anything peeping through the flap because no man has ever used the flap ever.”

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Luxury London development ruined by actual resident

AN EXCLUSIVE City development of £1m apartments has been scandalised by the revelation that someone lives there.

More than three-quarters of the Renzo Piano-designed Cube Point apartments overlooking the Thames are up for sale after the discovery that bond trader Joseph Turner has been living on the premises for long as six months.

Prince Rashad Al Maddah said: “This used to be a lovely mixed-use residential and high-end retail complex.

“You could stand out on your balcony and hear nothing but the gentle hum of your property accumulating value before returning to your suite at the Dorchester.

“But the other weekend I noticed a man dodging furtively into the elevator like he actually knew the place.

“Turns out he’s been living there full-time. Food in the cupboards, sleeping in the bed, showering, the lot.

“He may as well be a squatter.”

Turner said: “I know I’ve broken the service agreement, but my place in Dubai’s tied up in my divorce, the apartment in Paris is being sublet and the house in the Cotswolds was set on fire for tax reasons.

“If it helps at all I am a non-dom.”