Monopoly dog ‘could be next prime minister’

THE dog from Monopoly could easily win the next general election, it has emerged.

He’d order scientists to make him into a real dog so he could lick himself

As the makers of the board game asked the public to ‘re-elect’ its favourite piece, the metal terrier rapidly gained more votes than all of the major parties combined in the 2010 election.

Political analyst Emma Bradford said: “If electoral rules were changed to allow a scale model of a dog to run for parliament, there would be no contest.

“According to research, 64% of the public would be in favour of a Monopoly piece prime minister.

“Politicians are often described as ‘pawns’ so the general public are comfortable with board game tokens being in positions of power.”

However the Monopoly dog’s political orientation remains unclear.

Metal animal psychologist Norman Cooke said: “I think we can assume he doesn’t like cats. So we’d probably see some anti-cat legislation, like the lower branches being cut off of trees.

“Terriers generally dislike badgers, so the Monopoly dog would re-instate a cull.

“And I expect he would change planning laws so that you can build a hotel wherever you happen to be standing.”