Ocado reviews, and other places to find the angriest people in the world

LOOKING for an angry bastard? Forget pitchfork-wielding mobs or boxing rings, check out these cesspits of fury instead:

The Ocado reviews section

The idea that financial need breeds conflict is false. It’s actually people who are wealthy enough to spend £20 on dog shampoo then be dissatisfied with the packaging who are the first to resort to violence. The revolution will not be televised, it will be in a one-star review for organic chickpea hummus with za’atar oil.

A Royal Mail delivery office

This two-for-one location boasts a heady blend of customers who are almost as f**ked off as the staff who work there. It doesn’t matter if they bring their little red cards, seven forms of ID or even their house itself, they’re not getting that package. Rock up with some popcorn to enjoy with the apoplectic showmanship.

Hotel sun-loungers at 6am

There’s one thing livid people love on their holidays, and that’s threatening strangers over possession of a sun lounger that neither of them own. Expect passive-aggressive territory marking with towels, red-faced huffing, attempts to invoke the hotel authorities and finally someone being pushed in the pool.

The comments under anything about a woman doing anything

Doing a sport? Telling a joke? Learning to ride a bike? Share evidence of a woman doing literally anything with her time and you will be treated hordes of seething wankers riling each other up in the comments section over why she is wrong to have done so. You’ll be spoilt for choice.

The Question Time audience

Although the Question Time audience shares many boiling gammons with the previous entry, the residents of this particular locale are unique in being able to turn from salmon pink to deep puce in just one tirade about millennials.

Soft play areas

One for the pissed-off in training, soft play invites those who’ve just learned to use their legs for walking to try them out on kicking. If at any point they seem unwilling to articulate their inner animal rage, they need only look at their parents yelling at the adolescent staff for inspiration.

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Arsehole dinner party host accepts offer of help with washing up

A DINNER party guest has been forced to do the washing up after the arsehole host accepted her offer of help.

Emma Bradshaw was taken by surprise when her empty gesture of asking Martin Bishop if there was anything she could do was taken literally.

Emma said: “I popped my head around the kitchen door and asked whether Martin needed a hand, thinking he would tell me not to be so silly and usher me into the living room to sit on the sofa necking wine with the other guests.

“But instead the cheeky f**king bastard went and said yes, and the next thing I know I’m washing up like some kind of skivvy while everyone else gets pissed and eats their way through a box of Celebrations.

“Everyone knows you never accept offers of help at a party. I only asked to make myself look good. He hasn’t even got a dishwasher, the stupid prick.”

Martin Bishop said: “It’s been a brilliant evening and so kind of Emma to offer to help. In fact, the bins need taking out so I’ll get her to do that when she’s finished polishing the silver.”