Question Time audience 'main reason country is so f*cked'

THE audience for Question Time is the main reason Britain is so f*cked right now, research has confirmed.

The Institute for Studies found  the audience members – even if they made a good point or asked a genuinely relevant question – bore greater responsibility for the collapse of the country than Britain’s staggeringly awful politicians.

Audience member, Mary Fisher said: “I just want to know what exactly the people on the stage tonight plan to do about Brexit. I have grandchildren and I own a house.

“So you can obviously understand why I’m so terrified, confused and murderously furious about everything, all the time.”

Fellow audience member Martin Bishop added: “I used to vote Labour but now I vote for The Brexit Party because I really like Nigel Farage.

“Now treat me like a normal, sane person or I will call for you be executed.”

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BBC to employ people from all types of middle-class backgrounds

The BBC is to launch a diversity initiative that will see it employ people from a broader range of middle-class backgrounds.

In a bid to end the domination of the BBC by middle-class white men, the broadcaster wants to to employ middle-class women, a middle-class gay men or a middle-class people of colour.

A spokesman said: “Do you have a passion for television? Do you have a positive attitude? Did you grow up in a household that earned more than £57,000 per annum? Then call us now.

“We really don’t care where you’re from, it could be Chalfont St Giles or Henley-On-Thames. Forget about your background, we don’t care what your parents did, if they were a lawyer or a doctor, it’s all the same to us.

“We really do want our staff to reflect society, as long as we can pretend it’s a society in which council estates have never existed.”