A MAN has forfeited his basic human rights after returning a dented can of baked beans.Arguably not worth it
While 56-year-old Roy Hobbs did receive a full refund for the faulty can of beans, he inadvertently surrendered his right to empathy and the rule of law.
As Hobbs pocketed 68p, an alarm went off and the shopkeeper began to prod him with a stick while fellow customers repeatedly slapped his ears.
He was then bundled into a van with a sack over his head and has been held against his will ever since.
Hobbs said: I just presumed that my statutory rights wouldnt be affected.
I have no idea where I got that ridiculous idea from. Of course bringing back a can of beans means Id be treated like an animal.
All I want is to go home to my family, but the guards keep telling me I should have thought of that before I brought the beans back.
My cell mate has been here for 20 years since he tried to enter a phone-in on a radio show. He just keeps yelling that the answer is Right Said Fred.