Stoner stockpiling Kinder Bueno for no-deal Brexit

A STONER has begun stockpiling the Italian confectionery Kinder Bueno in preparation for a no-deal Brexit.

Tom Logan purchased every available multi-pack in his local supermarket and has stored them securely under his bed next to a bong in the shape of a skull and 30 cans of Rio.

Marijuana enthusiasts are set to be among the hardest hit should Britain be unable to negotiate a deal with the EU. Weekends in Amsterdam will become more expensive, and high-grade Dutch cannabis will be replaced with locally-grown ‘Brexit weed’ from a hot attic in Rutland.

Logan said: “I don’t normally like going to the shops because people are always looking at my eyes. But if May fucks this up the shelves in Tesco Metro are going to be bare apart from digestive biscuits, Marmite and Colman’s mustard.

“Worst case scenario we see hyper-inflation and we’re suddenly paying £1,200 for a Double Decker. I probably would though.”