Tax scandal reminds man that it would be nice to have a job

THE offshore tax avoidance scandal has reminded a man that earning enough money to pay tax would be quite nice.

Wayne Hayes, an unemployed engineer from Salford, has been following the Mossack Fonesca story with a sense of nostalgia for when he last had regular paid work.

Hayes said: “Much like an offshore shell company, I haven’t paid any income tax for years, though in my case it’s because I haven’t had a job since 2011.

“I got all misty-eyed thinking about the first time I completed a self-assessment form for HMRC. I wonder how long it will be before I have to do that again. Probably when I get another job.”

Hayes said he understood how challenging it must be for some people to keep track of all their finances, though he added that he himself had not experienced this particular difficulty, having not had a pay slip in five years.

He continued: “The six-figure sum David Cameron got from his parents is a bit like my Jobseeker’s Allowance, which is also tax-free because it’s fuck all.

“Still, I shouldn’t be annoyed because that would be the politics of envy.”