A WOMAN has looked at her smartphone 63 times in a day without finding the cure for her inner emptiness.
HR manager Donna Sheridan’s phone activity began at 7.35am when Facebook alerted her to a picture of people she didn’t know drinking wine on a houseboat.
Sheridan said: “As usual I checked my emails as soon as I got up, and yet again they were mostly about Nectar points.
“But of course it’s not about information. It’s about getting that mysterious something that will make me complete again.
“Every time it bleeps I think that might be the cure – the mysterious thing that stops this weird hollow feeling. But it’s just my housemate saying she’s staying at a friend’s house tonight.
“Then I have a quick look on Facebook and end up ‘liking’ my friend Trevor’s girlfriend’s brother’s crap ska band while feeling emptier than ever.”
Sheridan later viewed 31 other messages including an update for a time-wasting game called ‘Bubble Bust-Out’ and her flatmate asking if he should buy toilet paper, which can be stored indefinitely if not needed.
She added: “I don’t know what the answer is but I know it’s in this little glowing box. If I just keep looking at it, one day everything will be fine again.”