Workers perplexed as colleague opts for wet-look gel

OFFICE staff were confused this morning after a colleague arrived with wet-look gel in his hair.

Tom Booker, 32, usually opts for a more natural look, obtained using lots of wax.

Colleague, Eleanor Shaw, said: “Today he seems to have decided it’s 1996 again. He walked in and we all went quiet. It was like a stranger had walked into a pub in Leeds.

“Then he just said ‘good morning’ as if his hair was perfectly acceptable.”

She added: “I didn’t even know you could buy wet-look gel anymore. I assumed it was just a memory of the ’90s, like Panda Pops, Chumbawamba and vaguely acceptable homophobia.”

Office manager Martin Bishop added: “I hope everything’s alright at home.”

Booker said: “If you don’t mind, I am trying to attract women.”

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Number of years you’ve been alive 'tells you how old you really are'

SCIENTISTS have developed a new ‘age test’ based on when you were born.

Researchers at the Institute for Studies believe they have developed the definitive test of a person’s biological age, which is based on their birth date.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “We’ve seen dozens of internet tests purporting to tell you how old you really are, but none as accurate as this.

“To do it at home, simply add up the number of years you’ve been alive. For example, if you’ve been alive for 46 years, you are 46.”

59-year-old Julian Cook said: “This explains why I’ve been feeling a bit knackered lately.

“It’s because I was born an increasingly long time ago.”