THERE is no better motivation to get promoted, change career or finally start your own business than having an utter arsehole as your manager, experts have confirmed.
While workers who are praised and encouraged will remain at the same level for years, being unfairly criticised while the underling of a no-holds-barred credit-stealing obnoxious wanker is a sure route to working success.
Career psychologist Dr Helen Archer said: “A kind line manager who takes the time and effort to understand and assist their charges? Only holds you back.
“A vicious tosspot? Not only enhances team cohesion by giving everyone a hate figure, but also provides much needed impetus to seek promotion. They’re the vital oil in the wheels of success.
“So many vital career moves are provoked not by a ‘desire to lead a team and leverage my skills’ as liars claim at interview, but to ‘never see that strutting narcissistic prick again in my life’.
“Employees will put in hours of unpaid labour just to rack up the achievements needed to achieve escape velocity. We can only imagine how much technological progress will be engendered by those fleeing Elon Musk.”
Manager Julian Cook said: “I have to be a dick to them, but I hate it. At night, I knit socks for the poor, look at team photos with a tear in my eye and reassure myself it’s for their own good.”
