Freelancer changes from work pyjamas to leisure pyjamas 

A FREELANCER has marked the start of the weekend by changing from her formal work pyjamas into her loungewear pyjamas. 

Web designer Emma Bradford threw off the shackles of the working week by switching her functional black business PJs for her wildly individual ‘pizza slice’ pyjamas, reserved for ‘kicking back’.

She said: “My formal attire can be really stifling. Up top I need something I can throw a shirt over to pass as dressed in a Skype call, and the bottom half has to look just enough like jogging bottoms for the Yodel man.

“It’s very restricting. Sometimes I have to have a bath in the middle of the working day, just to feel free for a moment.

“Weekends are different. I wear my party PJs, let my hair down, and I’m free to just relax, relax, relax. I even wear a koala bear onesie in colder weather! Why not?

“Of course it doesn’t matter what pyjamas I wear, I’m still working. I’m a freelancer. I’m always working.”

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Rivers of Blood broadcast to contain closing line 'But don't listen to me, I'm mental'

A NEW broadcast of Enoch Powell’s infamous ‘Rivers of Blood’ speech will include his conclusion that everyone should probably ignore him, because he is barking mad.  

With Radio 4 planning to broadcast Powell’s notoriously racist speech in full tonight, a previously undiscovered new ending reveals everyone should probably have ignored him in the first place.

Presenter Amol Rajan said: “It’s funny to think we’ve been taking Enoch seriously all these years because at the end he clearly says, ‘Having said all that, I am pretty mental.’

“He goes on to say, ‘I mean, this race war thing might not happen. I could be entirely wrong, because I am a very strange man. I often think pigeons are spying on me, but that’s another matter.’

“It’s lucky we discovered the ending of the speech, because otherwise transmitting it might look like a pathetic attempt to get publicity.”

Following the broadcast, the speech will be released as a limited edition 10-inch record made from ‘Crimson Tiber’-coloured vinyl for Record Store Day.