Saturday, 7th December 2019

Man naively thinks last bit of toilet roll will be enough

A MAN wrongly assumed that the last few sheets of bog paper would be enough for his requirements.

Office worker Martin Bishop realised far too late that he would need more toilet paper than was available in the cubicle at work.

Bishop said: “I was hoping it would be one clean sweep but I forgot I’d been out on the beer last night so I ended up with a half-a-roll job on my hands. 

“At this point it was too late. I had done my business and somehow I would have to deal with it.

“First I used the cardboard tube - back and front - which was deeply demeaning. Then I tried a few old receipts I found in my pocket but they were not nearly absorbent enough.

“In the end I had to take a sock off and have a good wipe with that and flush it. I have to say it worked a treat.

“Actually it felt quite luxurious. Is it wrong to just use socks from now on?”