THE exact same people facilitating Boris Johnson’s escape from any kind of consequence are marvelling that he has escaped without consequences.
Conservative MPs are amazed that the greased piglet has once again slipped away scot-free, while standing with shiny hands next to an extra-large tub labelled ‘Piglet Grease’.
Susan Traherne, MP for Renfrewshire East, said: “Once again the consummate political survivor walks away from total disaster without a scratch. Hats off to him.
“No, I haven’t put in a letter of no confidence to the 1922 Committee. Why would I do that when he’s already proved it can’t stop him?”
Denys Finch Hatton, member for Waveney, agreed: “You can’t lay a finger on the man. That’s why I sat in silence behind him yesterday, even though I completely disagree with his actions.
“And the tabloid press just wave him by as if he’s done nothing at all, despite public anger. Did I tell them how I felt? Bloody hell no. I don’t want them laying into me.”
Voter Mary Fisher said: “Yep, he’s got away with it again. And I fully intend to vote for him again because it’s loveable.”