Anxious nation cheered by Gove’s dismal failure

BRITAIN is to start the weekend early in celebration of Michael Gove’s pathetic failure.

Gove was humiliated in the second round of the Tory leadership contest, giving a moment of unbridled happiness to a nation worried about the consequences of Brexit.

Tom Logan, from Hatfield, said: “More champagne!”

Jane Thompson, from Stevenage, added: “I want to see his face! I want to see his face!”

She added: “Perhaps Brexit won’t be that bad after all. Perhaps nothing will be that bad after all.

“What a splendid day.”